Trying not to try

It seems that when I’m trying not to try is when I always get the best results. When I get out from inside my head and just do things it always seems to work out best. I remember one time, many years ago when I was a runner, I went to a road race that I hadn’t even planned on going to. About two hours before start time I decided to go. I showed up and ended up obliterating the entire field. I was detached from the outcome and in trying not to try I only wanted to go and have a good time. Or when I am decorating a cake when I don’t think too much about it and just do it, I always seem to get the best results. Recently I was playing video poker at a local casino with some free play money the casino gave me. In just particular case I was just planning on playing the money through the machine and getting the points on my players club card. Next thing you know I hit a four of a kind. I played for close to an hour on their money and after some more play I had another four aces. I didn’t even want the money. I just wanted the points on my card. Since I had made 50% more then the money they offered me as free play I decided to cash out. It is sort of one of my rules. Up 50% and I quit. I took home a bunch of points and money that I didn’t plan on taking with me. Maybe there is something to be said about flow or just trying not to try or not thinking too much and getting out of inside of my head.

Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi wrote about it in his book Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience and a new book I look forward to reading has come out by Edward Slingerland called Trying Not to Try: The Art and Science of Spontaneity which also discusses the idea of not trying to hard. Csikszentmihalyi says that during flow, people typically experience deep enjoyment, creativity, and a total involvement with life. flow is roughly the equivalent to what most people refer to as being “in the zone” or “in the groove”. More elaborate definitions might be that it is “the state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter; the experience itself is so enjoyable that people do it even at great cost, for the sheer state of doing it.” Slingerland explains in his book why it is sometimes so hard to fall asleep when you are late to bed and have an early morning meeting or why it is hard to get a date when you are desperate. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi said, “Trying Not To Try is an enlightening introduction to the often misunderstood mindset of wu-wei, the ‘being in the moment’ that is the key to Eastern wisdom. Slingerland’s volume is an invaluable guide to anyone on the quest for a full life, lived spontaneously.”

Well, if Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi said so.

By thinking too much we often burden ourselves with much self-induced pressure. I think we would all be a bit better off if we could learn to slow down and live in and be present in the moment.

What do you do when you are trying not to try? What do you do to help live in the moment?